


Simon, You Evil Dork

by CaptainJZH



Category: Infinity Train (Cartoon)
Genre: A murderous dork, Gen, No Spoilers, Simon's voice sounds different when he's being threatening/dramatic, This is how he learned to do that, he thinks he's tough, simon's a dork, that's adorable
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-20
Updated: 2020-08-20
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:53:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26013685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainJZH/pseuds/CaptainJZH
Summary: Simon wants to sound tough and threatening for his speech. It's not working out very well.
Kudos: 24





	Simon, You Evil Dork

Simon paced in front of his mirror. He had to give his big speech to the new Apex recruits today. But his last one was too mushy, too inspiring. He had to make them  _ fear  _ their fate at the hands of One-One, so they could channel their fear into joining Apex in taking him down and racking their numbers up.

The only problem was, he didn’t want any help. Grace offered, but he wanted to practice his speech himself. He looked through his haphazardly-scribbled notes.

_ “Attention recruits!”  _ he began. “Nah, too formal. How about…  _ Fellow passengers!  _ Nope, not fearful enough. C’mon Simon, you can do this!” He looked at himself in the mirror, staring at himself angrily enough in the hopes that he would strike fear into  _ himself  _ and be able to use that to find his speech.

No luck.

“Ugh, why can’t I be threatening? Last time I threatened a Null, he laughed! I still killed him but it would be nice to have them be  _ scared  _ every once and a while!”

“Simon, you okay in there?” Grace asked through the door.

“YES, I’M OKAY!” Simon snapped.

“Alright, jeez,” Grace shrugged, walking away.

Simon sighed, slumping down on the toilet seat. He wished he could be as villainous and feared as the characters in his fantasy novel.

“Wait a second,” he muttered, standing back up.

When he gave voices to his miniature soldiers (or, as Grace put it, “played with his toys,” much to his embarrassment), he gave the main villain of his story a low, sadistic voice. Calm and cool. 

His  _ normal voice  _ was that of a dork, a dweeb. Someone only pretending to be tough. Now he could actually sound tough whenever he wanted.

_ “Former victims of the cruel, vile One-One!”  _ he began after rewriting his speech. “Oooh yes, that’s good.” 

_ “I, Simon, do hereby proclaim that you do not have to live in fear any longer!  _ Grace is gonna love this, heh.” 

_ “And we, Apex, ask you to join us in our fight against One-One’s evil tyranny, and to make the Nulls know their place!  _ Yup, nice and sexy. The new recruits are going to love me.”

If only writing his novel was that easy.

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to E350tb for beta-reading!


End file.
